How Evolution Screwed Us

HOW EVOLUTION HAS SCREWED US

For those of you isolated from the main stream, Tim Tebow, last week was extraordinary. He took a team of no great distinction and made it win, and with heroic style. The game was exciting and worth the time spent watching it. Swell. It is important to know that he is an extremely devout young man who does marvelous works of charity. Swell.

But, the city went somewhat bonkers about the event. Of course, not all people, but a significant number cheered, carried on and remained in the stadium well after the game ended. And, you can bet the vast bulk of Denverites eagerly looked forward to this morning’s paper to read all the details about the victory. After six futile years, winning a playoff game is a triumph that has already become part of Broncos lore. Decades from now, old men will boast to their grandchildren that they had seen the pass that won the game. (I cribbed this from Shakespeare, but it surely is apt.)

Since writing the above, the Broncos collapsed, with Tebow showing little distinction. I mean, it was a BIG loss with nothing to redeem it. What have the fan(atics) done? Why, they persist in extolling the Broncos and the future success of Tebow. I mean, you really have to be a believer to accuse the coach and Elway of the loss.

All this over a game that is fun, exciting, and violent just this side of brutality? No, not at all, no way, impossible. A truth about us is that we are an extremely territorial animal that bonds with our group all of whom extol our common virtues. Denver is better than Pittsburgh not only in football; winning is only the marker that exemplifies our superiority. Why are we so? Evolution.

In the good old caveman/woman days, well before football, banding together to own a particular hunting ground or a particular piece of land meant personal survival. Of course, there were independent souls who preferred isolation but few of them survived. Alone, they became the prey of other humans and animals. They could not hunt as successfully nor could they farm well; human existence depended on intense bonding with the group to ensure that all would protect one and one would protect all. Outliers did not reproduce because they died. Thus, we became herd animals defending our turf against all comers.

My late wife, at a Broncos game for the fun of provocation began to cheer for the NY Giants. Pretty quickly, Broncos fans began to insult her and there appeared a sense of potential violence; I had to shut her down lest I get beaten up for her idiocy. What crime? She had evoked the ancient rule that the group which, attacked, had to respond in kind because she threatened its survival. Well, not really, but evolution has not caught up with civilized reality.

During the Civil war, when everyone knew the South had not a chance they boasted that one southerner could lick five Yankees. What fun for them, but what blindness it exemplified and they could hardly believe they had lost. So, they established the KKK, a kind of guerrilla army to continue to fight for their values. There are still Southerners who espouse the old slogan: “Save your Confederate money boys, the South will rise again.”

Around the world, territoriality rules the day. Many Muslims recall fondly hundreds of years ago when their armies swept away all opposition and anticipate the day when the whole world will bow to their faith. Until recently, Europe had a series of wars over who owned which parcel of land. Only now, with the European Union is there peace but you can bet that many long for the good old days of total sovereignty. In spite of the union, Great Britain remains somewhat aloof in maintaining its own currency. Consider that when Communist Russia, the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, failed, those so called republics reverted to their original status of individual countries, reestablishing their territory. Perhaps Europe faces the same fate.

I'm not sure, but I think the United States is alone in successfully unifying disparate states. When the Articles of Confederation failed, the genius of our forefathers created the Constitution; all the states were part of the whole and the issue was decided when the South wanted to split and started a bloody war. That war bound us all together though reminiscences of the old days still flutter with arguments about states’ rights.

But, no more wars between us, never, and that is the hope for humanity. If we can give up territoriality (except for football fluff), we have a chance.

Whether summer or winter snow

Our hero is now Tim Tebow.

He makes us feel proud

We shout it out loud

But, remember its only for show.