THINKING ABOUT THINKING  

As is my wont, I lay in bed this morning thinking about what to eat for breakfast. Salad (with balsamic vinegar or sherry vinegar or cilantro, spicy vinegar), tuna salad, salmon salad, poached eggs, egg white omelet, a small steak, bacon and tomatoes, etc. I doubt if I have exhausted the possibilities. Nothing seemed interesting and then, not with an audible pop but surely close I knew I would poach two eggs and eat them atop the two halves of an English muffin, the eggs separated from the muffin halves by slices of black forest ham. I leaped out of bed with a glad song on my lips and thoroughly enjoyed the food accompanied by strong coffee, mixed with honey and almond flavoring.

You may have noticed that I did not decide; I only followed the system's instructions. By the “system” I mean the sum of my genetic inheritance, my general physical state and the totality of my life experience. All of me decided on breakfast, it only remained for what I call my mind to determine if I could fulfill the command. Eggs? Yes. English muffins? Yes. Black forest ham? Yes. Was there time? Yes. Was I too tired? No. Was it too caloric? No.

The system wants to get certain things and to avoid others. How can it get more money? Rob a bank, steal from a friend, knock someone down and run, get a job; I suppose the possibilities are legion. But, I evaluate whether such solutions are desirable. Having decided not, the system gets disgruntled and decides it wants candy, or in the old days, a drink, or an ear to cry into.

The system sometimes gives contradictory orders. Buy the Ferrari, but don't spend too much money. Obviously, both cannot be accomplished but sometimes I ponder selling my house. I don't and ultimately buy a much much cheaper car, but the system longs for the Ferrari. It demands consolation so I argue that Ferraris are way over priced and designed to satisfy the greed of the owners and the egos of the purchasers. The system mollified, I drive off in my Echo.

Humanity has pondered consciousness. Apparently, it proved we were different in kind from the beasts. Such rejection of our mammalian siblings could not withstand scrutiny. Observing them, we see ourselves writ small. It is clear that some animals are self-aware and their consciousness serves the same function: satisfy the system.

Consciousness (What we call our mind.) keeps us alive. It evaluates reality (as perceived at the time) and makes plans, all with the approval of the system. It could not have come into being over night but incrementally; the early bits of it kept some individuals alive; they reproduced and pretty soon (I mean millions of years) we became us.

Rather than being the lords of the earth, with free will guiding our daily lives, but we are merely servants of our systems. We cannot escape from our system because the system, it is us. Perhaps giving up the grandiosity will make it all palatable.

I've made some plans for the day; it will be interesting to see what my system will permit.

We are efficient, and well organized congregations

Of genes and life’s myriad of combinations

We boast we are clever

But, alas, it is rarely ever

We satisfy all system expectations